As a lifelong (so far) single person, I may seem an unlikely person to write about the joys of falling in love. The whole process of becoming – and remaining – part of a happily married couple is still a bit of a mystery to me.
However, as the frequently doting (my mother says besotted) and always devoted parent of two children, I can attest that the beautiful experience of “falling in love” is not limited to intimate, adult relationships.
I fall in love with my children regularly.
When they were babies, this happened automatically. They were cute, they appreciated me and their natural inclination was to snuggle. Now that they are pre-teens in the early throes of puberty, it takes a little conscious effort.
It’s still worth it.
My methods may not bring Prince Charming to your doorstep, but if you would like to fall in love (again?) with someone who is already a special part of your life, here is my prescription:
1. Love Yourself First
It has been said in a thousand different ways, but bears repeating: How can you possibly hope to love someone else, if you cannot access the love inside you?
You can’t.
So, check your own love bucket. Is it full? Take some quiet moments and honestly assess how you feel about yourself – your body, your personality, your talents and accomplishments, successes and failures. Your quirks. Your eternal spirit.
Are you in love?
If not, I ask you to trust me when I say that you can be. Please, please get yourself a copy of Louise Hays’ classic, You Can Heal Your Life. This is truly the gift that keeps on giving. With it, you can learn how to finally appreciate the marvelous, perfectly imperfect creation that is you.
Take good care of yourself – fall in love – and you will attract and spread love endlessly.
2. Open Your Heart and Put Out the Welcome Mat
Okay, now it’s time to make room for someone else in your heart. Whether it is your child, your spouse or that extremely annoying co-worker in the office down the hall, it can be done.
§ First, breathe deeply... in through your nose, out through your mouth. Repeat.
§ Close your eyes and imagine that you are breathing in through your heart... right into the middle of your chest. Feel it. Believe it.
§ Picture something that makes you feel amazing... something really awe-inspiring, like your first view of the Grand Canyon. Or the birth of your child. Keep breathing into your heart.
§ Now, picture your child (or any other person you choose to fall in love with today.) Picture them happy and joyful, carefree and open to all that life has to offer. See and feel the love radiating from them. If you can, reclaim a wonderful memory of the two of you together. If not, simply create a beautiful picture of a future loving moment between the two of you.
§ Take some time to talk to this person in your heart. Tell them all the wonderful things you see in them, now that you are looking with a clear perspective. Enjoy this other wonderful, perfectly imperfect being, who was created in love – just like you.
§ Go ahead, fall in love.
3. Practice, Practice, Practice
Some people are very easy to fall in love with. Others... well they seem to fight you, don’t they?
Just keep in mind that the person who seems to be making it hardest to fall in love with them, might be the one having the most trouble loving themselves.
If one of these people is your child, or your spouse – or even that annoying co-worker – you just might be able to help them experience the abundant love that is already inside of them. Practice step #2 regularly.
And when you are with your loved one in person, practice seeing all their beauty, love, sorrow and pain. Appreciate the wonderful, unique, crazy, exasperating, growing, evolving creation that is your child.
Go ahead, fall in love.
Recommended Reading:
Louise Hays’ You Can Heal Your Life is a perennial best-seller for good reason. If you haven’t already gifted yourself with this simple, wonderful book, maybe now’s the time. Enjoy!
Related Post:
For more ways to get in touch with the love in your relationships, check out “7 Ways to Make Peace with Your Child.”
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